Dear blank, please blank {dotcom}

This website is very clever.

Here are some "letters" that made me chuckle:

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Dear Mr. Pibb,

Maybe if you went to medical school you would be as popular as I am.

Sincerely, Dr. Pepper

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Dear teachers,

It's awkward enough seeing you in class; please don't make me see you in the bathroom too.

Sincerely, there's a faculty bathroom for a reason

I am so  guilty of this. 

I know my students feel so awkward when I invade their bathroom, 

but when you gotta go, you gotta go!

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Dear movie theaters,

Please tell me you are donating to a worthy cause.

Sincerely, I paid way too much.

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Dear Hollister,

How am I a small in every other store and an XL in yours?

Sincerely, I'm not a whale

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Dear almost empty shampoo bottle,

I see we speak the same language.

Sincerely, ketchup bottle.

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Dear students,

Please stop friend requesting me on Facebook. It's not going to happen.

Sincerely, your teacher